First I want to ask your forgiveness because I do not have a film production blog, just twitter, so I do not have a place where I can rant about these things and most of my friends are not even in anything remotely related to film so I can't really rant on any social media, I just need a listening, sympathetic ear, really. :/ So back in the summer I was entering film festivals with a script I had previously written and I happened to get into one of them (the rest I'm still waiting on) and I was so happy. Unbelievably happy. I thought I had finally done something right, in comparison to my last attempt at film fests which resulted in miserable rejection and me not working on anything for about 6 years because I was, well, embarrassed and thought I had no place at film fests. Long story short I decided to start on a new, animated film trailer project. my goal? Trailer fest. Let us count the ways this has failed: 1.) No one ever responded at the music company when I tried to get the rights to the song. They strung me along for a couple of emails but then they said they would have to wait for the artist's camp to get back them, that was July 7th and its September 27th, I think its safe to say I'm never hearing back about that song. 2.) Financial backer pulled out due to personal reasons. But I thought "Hey, no worries, I'll just use my own money!" And that was great until... 3.) Home repairs. The pipes underneath my house finally gave up the ghost so any and all film budget was eaten alive by that. Crowdfunding? What crowdfunding? I have no swag to give away therefore, no crowd funding for me! Besides its just a trailer, I doubt anyone would contribute to just a trailer. 4.) Casting, voice casting was abysmal. I didn't put up the notice here because of aforementioned reasons and didn't want to insult anyone by putting up a non-paying gig. At this point I can only afford to pay people with a copy of the trailer when it is released and I didn't think that would fly so I didn't bother you guys with it. I did find two people who were perfect for their roles but none for the lead, which is disenheartening. 5.) A background artist who wanted to take over the project!!! This is when my former film school training should have kicked in way earlier than it did but as a favor to a friend who is indeed an awesome background artist I decided to use them to make he backgrounds for the scenes. Artistically, it was the right decision. This person turned out to be hell on wheels to work with. When they got it right they got it right. However if they were not clear on something (even if it were a minor detail!) they would waste no time in arguing against my vision, the script, the storyboard, every tool that I had given them in order to do things their own way and do overhead shots when I specifically asked for tight shots on all backgrounds. (Having to argue for 2 days on the angle of a street corner is physically exhausting!) I've had to end up going in there and physically redrawing parts of the storyboard even when what I wanted was right there. It devolved into them insulting my production process and basically saying they could do better, so I let them off the project. 6.) The entire right side of my ribcage became inflamed and in the name of financing the film I didn't go to the doctor for 2 months and it got progressively worse while I was eating ibuprofens and waking up crying in the night. Now I've missed almost a week of work and am suffering horrible nausea from the medications I'm having to take for the inflammation. The last one was the straw that broke the camel's back. I've suspended production, possibly forever. on this project. I just needed a place to get this out and I do apologize if its in the wrong place. I'm disenheartened because I just wanted a trailer, not an entire movie, and I thought that was something that could be accomplished but I guess I was wrong. I'd appreciate not being told to suck it up, I realize every production has its bumps but this was just not what I signed on for. -G.R.B.