Authoring & Playwriting

Attention Writers!

Do you want to build immersive, believable worlds that draw readers in and keep them hooked? This Friday (1/24), join an exclusive virtual Ask Me Anything in the Stage 32 Writer’s Room Lounge with Karina Wilson, a Writer, Story Consultant, and Former Story & Development Analyst for...

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Hi, I’m Debra Holland, a psychotherapist, corporate crisis and grief counselor, and the author of The Essential Guide to Grief and Grieving. I’m also a New York Times and USA Today bestselling fiction author, who’s slowly adapting some of my books into pilots and screenplays.

I spoke with Ashley ab...

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I spoke with Ashley about posting in several of the lounges where the Stage 32 community could discuss our reactions to the fires burning the communities surrounding Los Angeles. Most of us are experiencing collective grief over the devastation, powerlessness to mitigate the disaster, concern for those who’ve lost everything, discouragement for how we can possibly rebuild what was lost, fear and anxiety for what might happen individually and collectively with future fires, and concerns for how this will impact the entertainment industry, which has already suffered from the pandemic and the strikes.

I want this post to be a safe place for people to share feelings, where I can give people needing support some ways to process their emotions, as well as some coping tips. I want people to know they weren’t alone in their feelings and reactions. I want commenters who will be supportive of each other.

In our Stage 32 community, we have people who’ve lost their homes and possessions, those who’ve evacuated, but whose homes are still standing, those who live in the Los Angeles area who are watching the fires with horror, those who used to live in LA or have visited and feel a connection, and those who live in other parts of the country and world who dream of being part of the Hollywood entertainment community.

The fires aren’t over. The Santa Ana winds will return soon, stirring up existing fires and, perhaps, fanning the flames of accidental or deliberately set fires in other parts of Los Angeles, San Fernando, San Gabriel, and Orange Counties. Those who live here are feeling on the edge for what may happen next.

The truth about loss is we don’t have a lot of words of comfort, which for people who want to (or do) make their living through writing or bringing words to life may seem like a strange statement. Yes, everyone can feel grateful that they (and hopefully their pets) are safe. They can tell themselves (and others will tell them) that all they’ve lost is stuff. They will say that things can be replaced, which is probably true for about 75% of our possessions and our homes. Yet, the rest is irreplaceable and will be mourned over and over again. The loss of our safe (and often beloved) spaces is gone, perhaps forever.

So, here in the comments, and elsewhere when you talk to or comment on someone’s story or experience, instead of trying to fix their feelings of grief and loss, be with them in their powerlessness and in your own. If you are having an in-person conversation, show with your presence, your expression, the look in your eyes, the listening noises you make, that you are a safe person for them to confide in. In your verbal or written responses validate their feelings by using the words, “I understand.” Then fill in what you understood.

For example: A friend is mourning their favorite art piece.

You don’t say, “You will find another piece you like just as well.”

You do say something like, “I understand you’re mourning that painting of the ocean, which always hung in your bedroom, no matter where you lived. I remember you once told me that you saved for months to buy it, and how it always gave you a sense of peace. I know that piece of art can’t be replicated, and maybe you’re wondering if wherever your bedroom is in the future, you’ll always be reminded of the loss.”

The person might not have said all those words. But you can infer some of them through the context of their share, any past knowledge you have of your friend, and what you might feel in the same circumstance. You might even be helping them realize an emotion they hadn’t yet tuned into, such as their future fears or a deeper meaning to the piece than they realized.

As you share in the comments section, please leave out blame, especially political blame. The fires were caused by a whole host of factors, mostly the extreme high winds. Anger is normal. Wanting to find a target for our anger is normal. It’s also counterproductive for our mental health.

At a time when we feel so powerless, anger makes us feel more powerful. Often, we use anger to leap over other, more vulnerable, feelings such as fear, anxiety, despair, sadness, or shame. If you’re angry, see if you can slide your anger to the side and see what other emotions might lie underneath. Allow yourself to feel, express, and write about those feelings.

After the fires in 2020, I wrote a Medium article about coping after a fire. It’s pretty extensive, so I’ll give you the link, instead of adding more to this post.

https://debraholland.medium.com/coping-after-a-fire-a307ac4825c3?sk=c7be...

I’ll pop in to comment when I can. In the coming days, I anticipate doing a lot of crisis and grief counseling. I also have a book preorder due for publication at the end of the month (which I might have to postpone.) If I don’t answer right away, please know that a response will be coming.

Maurice Vaughan

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3 people like this
4 months ago

Great share, Ashley Renee Smith! I'm not a novelist, but writing the middle of a script is tricky sometimes. Raising the stakes, using a twist, and paying off a setup are some ways I keep my scripts e...

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Leonardo Ramirez

Very familiar Ashley Renee Smith. I'm with Maurice on this one. Add a twist and raise the stakes and you're good to go. We tend to share the stakes at the beginning but if we consider in pre-planning...

Ashley Renee Smith

Completely agree, Maurice Vaughan and Leonardo Ramirez!

Jonathan Jordan

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2 people like this
- Ashley Renee Smith
- Maurice Vaughan
4 months ago

When I get to the middle and get stuck, I jump ahead to the next part of the story that's clear in my mind. Then I got back and build the bridge. Reading is linear but writing doesn't have to be! This has saved me from writer's block countless times.

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1 person likes this
- Maurice Vaughan
4 months ago

That makes a lot of sense, Jonathan Jordan! I need to be more mindful of that when I feel stuck in my own writing.

Sandra Isabel Correia

This AMA is so good! World Building! And I can’t wait for Karina Wilson answers :))

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2 people like this
- Maurice Vaughan
- Leonardo Ramirez
4 months ago

Thank you for sharing, Leonardo Ramirez!

Absolutely Ashley Renee Smith ! Downloaded some myself!

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1 person likes this
- Ashley Renee Smith
4 months ago

Hi, Fatema Elmahdy. I've had cravings to write. I will either write my main script, think of ideas for my main script, write random scenes, write a short script, outline a story, or do research for a...

Fatema Elmahdy

mmm ,that's nice, I liked this part " write randomly" cause sometimes i feel that when we put a frame for our writing will kill the creativity flow

Yes, Fatema Elmahdy! I've been totally addicted to my writing for the last two weeks. I find myself trying to power through as much work and house chores as possible during the day just so I can dive...

Sam Sokolow

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2 people like this
- Bradford Richardson
- Maurice Vaughan
4 months ago

Thank you so much for this post, Debra Holland. This is an unconscionable occurance and so many friends and family members are hurting and dealing with the loss of their homes, businesses and valued p...

Debra Holland

Thanks, Sam Sokolow. I'm doing what I can to help.

Virginia Youngren

The suspense and uncertainty add to the problem here; what is the magnitude of the loss? It is still going on.

Exactly, Virginia Youngren. We still have winds to worry about, with increasing the fire risk. And magnitude can keep increasing. First we mourn this loss and then the next loss, and the next....

Thank you again for taking the time to start this conversation, Debra Holland. I’m glad to know that these posts—and you—are here in the community for anyone who needs it. It’s so important to have sp...

Lindbergh E Hollingsworth

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3 people like this
5 months ago

Probably best if you tackle this ... head over to Amazon and search for political satire books, and find out whom published them. Great starting point. There's also a book of publishers that lists all...

Laurie Woodward

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2 people like this
- Benjamin Elliott
- Maurice Vaughan
4 months ago

Look at the Writer's Market. It is the best book for lists. Good luck!

View all All comments

William Joseph Hill

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4 people like this
5 months ago

For me, stepping away and not thinking about writing helps to clear my mind. A lot of my best ideas come when I'm exercising. It's like a Zen meditation.

Jon Shallit

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5 people like this
5 months ago

I've never had writer's block. Listen to the characters talking and just write what they say and do. Divorce yourself from interfering with their authentic voices. Hope that helps.

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6 people like this
5 months ago

I don't have writer's block. But I do have writer's avoidance. To get through that, I make myself THINK about what comes next in the story or what A (not THE) next point in a nonfiction piece can be. If I can't start writing or write down notes, I'll dictate my ideas into an app on my iphone.

Mark Deuce

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2 people like this
- Benjamin Elliott
- Banafsheh Esmailzadeh
5 months ago

Chatgpt helps me...

I force myself to sit down and write every day so don't have block. Sometimes I do research. Others I choose to write a poem or a blog post or a letter to a friend. But if you keep that muscle working daily, those times will be less and less.

Philip David Lee

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5 people like this
6 months ago

Hey Caroline.

For the most part, studios think a movie based on your novel will equate to ticket sales if you have good circulation numbers and depending on the genre of the book. Action stories, while Expand comment

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2 people like this
- William Joseph Hill
- Maurice Vaughan
5 months ago

You're right to be superdy duper cautious here Caroline Dowdall. Lots of scammers out there these days trying this crap, preying on writers' hopes and dreams and then duping them into paying some kind...

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1 person likes this
- Benjamin Elliott
5 months ago

Hi Caroline Dowdall ! Developing a book into a film is a very lengthy process that takes years to pull off. I would be suspicious of any unsolicited company offering to turn your book into a film. Jus...

David E. Gates

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2 people like this
- Benjamin Elliott
- Maurice Vaughan
5 months ago

I've had numerous scammers try and approach me this way. A quick search on the "deal" they're offering reveals them to be the charlatans they are.

Be careful, there are MANY scammers out there who will take your money. Always check out the sender and their company on Linked In and on line. If they ask you for any money, run!

Debra Holland definitely agree with you that most small presses aren't worth it. At best, they're new and don't know what they're doing yet. At worst, they're scams. But yes, some genre presses are le...

If you have the files ready to go, then self-publishing is probably the best/easiest way to get them back into the world. Gives you complete control and likely better royalties too.

Susan Wile

I agree with David Gates. Meantime, check out Jane Friedman. Former head of a major publishing company, she's a book publishing expert with a WEALTH of information. She includes a line by line checkli...

Samuel Minier

Susan Wile thanks so much, this is great!

I have had friends publish anthologies themselves and while not terribly lucrative did help their online presence.

Eon C. Rambally

And of course! Momentarily I swore I was somehow out of touch with technology. Presentations are viewed on TV, phones, Tablets etc. Therefore generally should be at the highest professional levels possible!

John Hetherington

Tell people to put down their phones! If the story is compelling enough and people care about the characters would it not draw their attention away from doom scrolling etc?

Norman Welthagen

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1 person likes this
- Eon C. Rambally
4 months ago

It explains so much.

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2 people like this
- Eon C. Rambally
- Maurice Vaughan
4 months ago

At the end of the day, I'm going to write from the soul Pamela Jaye Smith. If I was working for Netflix on a show, I'd be a paid employee that would need to heed their request even if it's not somethi...

4 months ago

My first comment is a good example of, when you "Dumb Down" presentations. Q; Should anyone want that for themselves or "recommend" for another? Great conversations collectively!

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