Hello everyone! I am new to Stage32 and still learning about it. I am also new to creative writing. I completed a sci-fi manuscript that got the attention of someone working in TV and suggested to me that I should think about a TV series. I am working under the guidance of this person on a pilot and the show bible of what has become a sci-fi mystery thriller...very challenging genre, keeping me quite entertained! I have a logline I'd like some feedback on. Hope this is the right place for this kind of questions. So...here it is: A teenage girl from the Arctic fights for the survival of her people in a world destroyed by global warning and where everyone else lives underground.
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Welcome aboard! I have wtirren a few TV pilots and one is a sic-fi/superhero fantasy adventure. Not an easy genre but fun worlds to develop!
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Thank you Kathryn, David, and Laura!! I look forward to know more about your projects :)
A lot of hard work I'm sure but the important thing is enjoying doing it and it sounds like you are welcome to the stage!
I've been on for a few days now. Its coming along.
I'm also relatively new to the site. But its a great resource.
Good luck on your project!
Thank you all for the best wishes on my project...anyone who can give me some honest reaction to the logline?
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Hi Stefania, I wish you luck too. Concerning your question about you log line - to be honest - I find a little weak. A log line should make the reader curious about what your story is about. It should be short, but can be in 1-3 short sentences. Like this here (the film is already produced years ago), which is a pretty long log line (actually already a little too long): "Three suburban teenagers play dangerous mind games that lead them on a collision course with reality. A charismatic boy leads his best friend and girlfriend on a dangerous psychic journey into confronting their innermost fears that leads them to ultimately committing a random murder." You see, you tell everything without telling everything. This is the only advice that I can give and I know how difficult it is to write log lines for your own stories. I think mine are always weak too.
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I think it is important which adjectives you use in your log line as adjectives touch peoples emotions and awake the reader's fantasy in a vivid way.
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Elisabeth has good points. Loglines are tough but necessary. For you as a writer it can keep you on course to keep true to your story. As a sales tool, it must peek the interest of those who make decisions. IMO There needs to be an seemingly unsurmountable obstacle (What your character is fighting against) in which would make the audience wonder how this could ever be conquered. Also a character who one would either cheer for or wish their demise. To do this in 25-30 words without revealing the whole story is the challenge. I will be happy to help further if needed. I may need your eyes someday. I wish you much success.
Elisabeth and Boomer...that's the kind of feedback I was looking for! Emotions...surmountable obstacles...the good and the bad! I will work on this and hopefully will have an improved version soon. Thank you very much for the honest advice.
I'm a sci-fi fan also.
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In a world destroyed by global warming one girl must fight for the survival of her people ,
Always welcome, Stefania. @Mike Roberts that sounds much better, but I think not convincing yet. Plus, it must be global WARMING.
;-)
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Sci-Fi is most certainly a challenging genre? I don't think many of the prod cos like it at all, I have pitched a time travel script for months to different execs and this is an actual TV company remark: "Should be set in the future. Time travel is tough. Echoes of other work in this genre that uses that device. Feels a little too familiar. Pass." I now pitch scripts as mystery and suspense - its difficult to make Sci-Fi stand out after all the Hunger Games and Dr WHO series. Your logline is too transparent just asking for a 'pass'. I would avoid global warming and anything underground, make the exec want to know more and then he may request your script.
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Sounds like a great concept! Small detail, the world is probably not destroyed, its just no longer going to support human life as we know it... Still, I'd like to see it!
I love Sci-Fi because I think it is a platform to show what could be if we as a species do not take care of the issues at hand. Glad to see a woman writing in this genre. Wishing you many successes.
Привет Стефания ! Как я могу прочитать синопсис Вашего сценария
Stefania: You are an AWESOME creative person! Looking for great things to continue to come from you! BTW: Do you know Marc Zicree? If not, you should...so message me if that is the case!
Good going... I wish you much success!
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Everyone....thank you for all your input and encouragement...I wish my exciting day job wasn't so time consuming and I actually had time to be on stage32 more often. I'll give it a stab at a second draft for the logline in a little while.