Posting here in “ Anything Goes” because I am not really sure where else I could post this
Anyway, I am a very strong believer in collaboration and offering help in this industry, not just for credit, but because everyone is the new guy sometime and because everyone struggles and an encouraging word can really make a difference.
That being said, when do you say, enough, when do you stop offering the advice?
I am finding myself hitting my head against a wall of excuses with someone right now, they are a content creator and wannabe youtuber, I offer a number of suggestions both in terms of the content they make and the way in which they release it ( they do content dumps of around 5 videos at a time which I maintain puts subscribers off and they will rarely watch more than one, I know I wouldn’t and honestly if he weren’t a friend I would have unsubscribed after the 10 notifications in a row )
I offer small little tidbits (also suggested working on a project together that he flaked on) that I think could help, given he is often complaining into the air on various SMs, that he isn’t taken seriously, isn’t getting traction, youtube algorithm is against him, because he is different people aren’t picking up on it.
For me, it is simple: If you are having these issues and you are complaining daily, do something about it to change it, improve it.
Whenever I or indeed others, offer suggestions, there is ALWAYS a reason why he does it the way he does and the other way wouldn’t work.
I am at my wits end, I am close to telling him to go **** himself and call it quits on the negativity.
So. . . When do you stop offering help? Especially when you consider the person a friend.
1 person likes this
Hi Natalie, my suggestion is, run for the door and keep going. Is your name on the project? Credits? Does he pay you for the help you give? Madonna used to say "Time is money and money is mine!". :) If helping him gives you some experience/lessons/advantages you can use, that can compensate for the lack of return...but as it is frustrating you rather than helping you - let it go. Use your time for your own projects - I learned the hard way that the more energy you give away the less you have for yourself. Good luck! :)
1 person likes this
I do use my time for my own projects, most of what I work on is my own stuff, most of the "help" is just a quick whatsapp, tweet or email here and there and I guess " consulting"
You are right though, this kind of help is what others pay me for, I have years of experience writing and producing various kinds of content and if he isn't willing to at least listen I am not willing to share.
One part considers if his resistance is because I am female and younger than he, despite my being in this field for longer than him, he seems to take my suggestions as criticism and gets instantly defensive. Don't really have the head to deal with yet more sexism TBH.
Thanks for your input I appreciate it.
1 person likes this
Uh those are the worst ones! They cannot even appreciate your help...Maybe he is jealous? Shame on him, he is the one missing out... :)