This logline is a bit too long and goes into synopsis territory.

Exactly right, Michael Dzurak ! I had kind of forgotten I'd written this until I got a couple of ratings from peeps I'd rated/commented on. I've read a lot of loglines, and learned a lot about them in the year since I wrote this one. I kind of wonder if I was drinking, or high on Save The Cat! at the time. But here's how I would rate it now:

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I rate my own logline: 3 stars

Brill hook, but it gets muddy on the mechanics while shifting from a sharp external engine into self-help group therapy. Cut the comma sprawl: too many clauses, too many ideas, too much explanation. Killer title, by the way! (Mo's note, I like to end on an upbeat)- - -

And just for interest's sake, here's how I'd do it now that I've learned a thing or two about loglines and the ones that raise my eyebrows and request the script:

After a blackout binge, a hedonistic heir wakes up carrying another man’s ID and charged with his own murder. Penniless and defended by a lawyer who thinks he’s guilty, he must prove who he is by retracing the trail of people he cheated, used, and betrayed before the state buries him as someone else.