Post your loglines. Get and give feedback.

By Lauren McKean

GENRE: Sci-fi, Animation, Comedy

During the night of the presidential inauguration the newly elected president, an assassin, refugee worker, and the former president are kidnapped by a passing alien spaceship. Now they’re stuck in space, tackling intergalactic issues, as they try to get back to the planet they call home.

Lauren McKean

Thanks for the feedback guys. I can definitely make it clearer although the characters do serve a very specific purpose so it needs to be all four. Keep the feedback coming.

Dan MaxXx

Where is the synopsis? Kinda hard to judge your writing and execution with a logline.... but just on the surface, your logline feels too complicated, mixing in too many genres.

Lauren McKean

@Danmaxxx What do you mean by mixing in too many genres? Which genres does the logline convey to you?

Derwin Gonzalez

I like it as a summary of your show, it seems like it could be a lot of fun. However a true logline needs to be shorter. Don't feel bad my logline is overly long too.

Lee Cohen

Just my two cents: your logline definitely made me intrigued and eager to read more. I can't speak to the proper length of a logline. My only critique would be that right now it reads like there's four characters, when in fact there's five--the aliens (I'm grouping them all together). You could make this even more absurd with something like, "now they're trapped with a xenophobic race of aliens hurtling through space" or something?

Elisabeth Johanna Bennenbroek

Every story can be good, and the choice of words, is very important, can drive the reader to read more, or put the book away, or anything that is written.

Wilmer Villanueva

Rated this logline

Wilmer Villanueva

Very original!

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