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THE NIGHTMARE
By Felix Agyeman Boahen

GENRE: Adventure, Comedy
LOGLINE:

A cowardly teenager finds himself in ancient times, participating in the greatest war in Greek history to save his lover.

Brian Shell

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Brian Shell

I like this Felix. Your logline is tight, but it needs a bit more flavor... just 1-2 adjectives to spice it up a tad.

Felix Agyeman Boahen

Brian, I love to hear this. Just feel free and frame something better out of this. You've been permitted. I love to read from genius folks.

Brian Shell

Thanks Felix... flattery works. Anyhoo, I'd change "coward adventure movie subscriber" (too wordy) and check out Martin Lawrence's rendition of the old classic Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court by Mark Twain.

Felix Agyeman Boahen

You are right, Brian Shell, I thought so. I wanted to know how it will be seen in public. Thanks much. I owe you one...

Brian Shell

Perhaps change "coward" to "cowardly"... and use some kind of adjective to describe the "lover" your hero is going to save. Also, it'd be interesting to get placed into the body of Patroclus of The Iliad prior to his fight with Hector.

Felix Agyeman Boahen

Are sure an adverb would be better than a now?

Felix Agyeman Boahen

noun*

Brian Shell

What word did they use in The Wizard of Oz? The Cowardly Lion

Felix Agyeman Boahen

Patroclus wasn't coward, Brian Shell. There will be a way to put it, Brian.

Nathaniel Baker

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Brian Shell

With that being the case Felix, change your protag into "a cocky teenage karate prodigy" who must learn to lose in order to win the life of his first love when a wormhole sends him repeatedly into the body of Patroclus for a dozen 5-minute chop-sockie fights with Hector from The Iliad.

So with that Felix, he must lose his ego like in White Men Can't Jump with shades of Groundhog Day and The Butterfly Effect plus 12 Run Lola Run scenarios where your character repeatedly inhabits Patroclus... like his wormhole Avatar - and Back to the Future evolving outcomes.

Each time he goes down the wormhole and kicks Hector's ass, he comes back to the present with his first love shattered and in shambles. Each time he learns to lose a little in the past, her health improves towards a future - in True Love - Together as a Team

Felix Agyeman Boahen

Your idea sounds great, Brian Shell. Thanks much.

Brian Shell

All I'm doing is brainstorming Felix... use any, all, or none. Sometimes you just gotta freeform and spin ideas... because along the way, usually there's some gem you'll discover that makes you appreciate the spit-ballin'. The nice thing is that Patroclus and Hector are public domain, I believe (but I'd double-check it just to make sure if you do use that battle for your transforming hero to arrive into).

When I was working for an aerospace firm in LA, we'd secure a group of rooms where we'd put all of our designs for the satellite upon on the walls of those inter-connected rooms. We called it "the bullpen."

And as new, better designs arrived, they'd go atop the old design because it raised the bar of that particular portion of the satellite's design (in my case, I was the antenna person). That way, the entire design was visible for anyone to make better. Egoless design evolution.

In that case, it took us two years of revising designs in that bullpen, but at the end, we won a contract for 15 satellites and 1.3 billion dollars. Focus was the key... and having a dedicated place to brainstorm for anyone to see.

Felix Agyeman Boahen

Brian Shell, I love listening to ideas, new ideas. Even if I have the greatest one, I always want to hear what someone also has. Your idea is really great; Patroclus is a teenager. He is a perfect character for this play.

I'm a great fan of Greek history, and I have read the Iliad, though not the whole book but little, and from Troy, I have known both Patroclus (Achilles' nephew) and Hector (the defender of Troy). They are well known as you say, but there are some things you are forgetting.

Patroclus didn't find love in Troy or it's environs, besides he wasn't coward. So trying to fix this in a well-known epic will be well criticized. And maybe boring because we all know Patroclus died at Hector's sword. How can you change this?

We are screenwriters. We create, we don't form around someone else's success (maybe somehow we can). At the start of every new project is a blank page. You have all the possibilities to create something new and something greater than the ones regarded as successful.

There are many ways this can be done. And there are many wars greater than the siege of Troy. Even the Greco-Persian Wars are greater and can match this plot perfectly by using the city of Athens when Xerxes attacked it. Brian Shell, you are a great artist, your ideas are good but it will also have some criticisms which producers will hardly tolerate.

Brian Shell

The thing I like Felix is that by comparing new ideas, you can discern whether the new one raises the bar. If not, you have greater confidence, via deduction, what your final destination will be... like in Life.

Brian Shell

I'm not inferring that Patroclus falls in love. It's that the outcome of this battle introduces a butterfly effect for your hero's love in the present day. The current movie that uses this technique is Deadpool 2 via Cable's motive for time travel.

Felix Agyeman Boahen

I don't really get you, Brian Shell. Let's talk privately.

Juno Dante Night

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Peter Koslik

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Kervin Juarez

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