When FOMO gets in the way of your Creative Work

When FOMO gets in the way of your Creative Work

When FOMO gets in the way of your Creative Work

Alexia Melocchi
Alexia Melocchi
3 years ago

FOMO: (Fear of Missing Out) – that anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often aroused by posts seen on social media.

Have you ever found yourself scrolling your Instagram or Twitter or Facebook for hours, lingering on those posts where mega deals are entered into by your fellow Artists? Or as they go LIVE on their Social to show off being on set on a film or tv show?

Are you feeling dejected when friends, your fellow artists, or even total strangers post about their fabulous life and prolific career?

As we are all still in the midst of a pandemic, with so much uncertainty surrounding us, it is as easy to get sucked into FOMO as it is to depression. Both seem interconnected.

While I have been a champion of community and information for Hollywood longevity, I am also acutely aware of how addictive Social Media can be and both its positive and negative psychological effects.

When FOMO gets in the way of your Creative Work

Artists and Content Creators are generally compassionate souls. We pour our hearts into those script pages, those acting roles, framing that perfect shot, pitching our passion project in the room. Rejection is a constant. But when it isis experienced directly, it is more easily handled, mainly if we are fueled by passion and determination. When it is experienced indirectly, I call it the "Why not Me Syndrome," it can create a sleuth of self-doubt, the most dangerous and stagnant emotion of all, in my personal opinion.

During the Pandemic, I also experienced FOMO in spades. While looking for those signs of the needle moving in the Entertainment Industry, I got lost in the happy and exciting personal lives of others, with a mixture of celebration but also a hint of dejection and, let me be honest, even envy.

I have always been very confident in my work, due to being 30 years in the Business (hello, I am still here!) and being a fierce advocate for constant learning and authentic networking.

But for me, marriages, baby births, travel photos, extended family gatherings, vast and new business successes outside of my world, after seeing our Entertainment Industry crumble for the past two years, have been tough to digest. Possibly because when our FIRE is put out (if we are obsessed creators like yours truly), then we notice the things we should have given more time to and did not, such as personal and everyday life, and that emptiness becomes palpable.

To fight this FOMO, or actually, more like embracing it, I poured my energy into leveling up my spiritual growth and Mindset. I talk about this on my Season 3 episode 1 podcast.

When FOMO gets in the way of your Creative Work

So I am going to give you some practical and Mindset tips to help your FOMO be gone. It worked wonders for me, and it was all done by trial and error.

The Practical FOMO cure

1. Go on a digital detox

Put your phone down, or turn it to airplane mode. Silence all notifications on your computer. Don't read about those mega-deals in the Trades. Put that news in a separate folder and read them only once a week.

2. Turn off the News

Believe me, if a natural disaster is looming, the news will get to you somehow. The Pandemic brainwash is actually creating long-term PTSD in all of us.

3. Stop doing too many of too many things

You do not need to write 10 movies, binge-watch, or send hundreds of emails like a robot.

Practice the Pomodoro Technique (see my Stage 32 blog from a few years back).

There is something of great value in intentionality and essentialism. Do a Marie Kondo on your entire life.

4. Stop posting just to get a one-up on others on your extraordinary life

The more authentic you are, the better relationships you will attract.

When FOMO gets in the way of your Creative Work

The Mindset FOMO hacks

1. Dig deep to find out what you truly want - an actual want is not a wish but an outcome

What outcomes in all areas of your life and in your projects do you want to happen? List them in practical and attainable baby steps.

2. Meditate on how you feel when they happen

We are in the Business of MOVING IMAGES, so it should be easier for you to do than most. The more vivid and detailed the image of the outcome, the stronger the feeling.

3. Share your emotions and put them on paper

Reread those when tempted to get hypnotized by your Facebook, Twitter, or IG feed.

"Money is the byproduct of doing the right thing ."This is one of the personally created mantras that has reminded me of all that happens at the right time and with the right stage of mind.

I look forward to your feedback as you move out of FOMO, Fear of Missing Out, and head into MASH, Making Authentic Shit Happen.

Links:

ESSENTIALISM

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About the Author

Alexia Melocchi

Alexia Melocchi

Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor

Alexia Melocchi is a partner in LITTLE STUDIO FILMS and has had a successful career in the international marketplace, as both a sales agent and buyer’s rep for eleven territories, giving her diverse exposure to all types of films and functions in the entertainment industry. As producer and developm...

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14 Comments on Alexia's Article

Eddie James
Actor, Editor, Filmmaker, Producer, Screenwriter, Singer, Videographer, Voice Actor
Wowza, I really needed that. Word for word I identified. Thank you. I've been a working pro in this biz (like you) for 30+ years. And I don't need advice on how to handle rejection or how to be happy for others' successes. But people always seem to want to respond with that whenever I share my FOMO or similar feelings. I usually respond with "if you knew me, you'd know I am a power hitter. And please don't!" Social Media is the worst and best thing that ever happened to this industry. Proven fact-based research: 60% of professional and personal posts are fabricated/exaggerated/false/fake/etc... and 96% of all pictures are filtered and enhanced in one way or another but still... my compare and despair syndrome (especially now) is very real and hyper-sensitive. And don't get me started about the sunset/ocean/birds flying over the Grand Canyon, blah, blah, blah quotes about inner strength... Gosh, I better stop. Thank you, thank you for the practical FOMO cure & mindset hacks. Mostly, thank you for addressing this topic. It is very real and scary. Last year I did a 9-month deactivation of all my social media but I'm looking for a new agent so... I may deactivate again anyway. Best,
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
Hi Eddie- yes, social media can be exhausting and also depressing..important to see both sides of the coin and work on the proper mindset to make it work for us but also allow us to thrive in our creations.
3 years ago
Leotien Parlevliet
Author, Screenwriter
I love this very much as it sounds very familiar to me. When I get that feeling, which is often, I meditate for 20 minutes on Dolphins, which are  a very rich inspirational source. I also owe my two scripts to them. Like you, I embrace the spiritual world.
3 years ago
Leotien Parlevliet
Author, Screenwriter
Me too, but only if they would like me to join them.
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
I always wanted to swim with the dolphins..
3 years ago
Michele Marie Traina
Actor, Screenwriter, Comedian
I love this, so true!! I love social media, especially helps with marketing my standup gigs and I love creating content. But it for sure can get to me at times with additions to new apps being added, influencers that seem to rise faster than you, and making you feel like what you love creating isn't good enough according to views. Self doubt 100 percent, especially the highs and lows of our personal lives mixed with our professional ones, glad I saw this today, thanks Alexia!
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
You are welcome Michele!
3 years ago
Marina Albert
Screenwriter, Producer
Great article, Alexia! Glad I'm not alone. Even our dogs stop to smell the 'roses' on their walks. I often stop to marvel at the simplicity in that. I couldn't help recalling the turtle (or is tortoise) and the hare tale. We all know who won that race! Intentionality - YES! I find the moment I log onto FB, I'm bombarded and have to duck for cover. Soooo tempted to put out the 'Writer Busy at Work' sign out :)
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
I love that sign! Do it.. :)
3 years ago
Haley Mary
Actor, Songwriter, Comedian
Great article and I have the fear of missing out for the past couple years as I saw some of my friends getting married, having children, some are returning to some open mic nights, but I don't feel comfortable attending the open mic nights in the bars yet until the pandemic has reached endemic status. I'm hoping to get back into things by the summer. I am also a spiritual person and listen to meditation music sometimes to relax. I was also so lonely during the early stages of the pandemic that I adopted a new kitten in July 2020 a couple months after my senior cat died. My cat keeps me company and I don't think I would be able to go through this pandemic without a furry companion. 
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
That's so great you adopted a kitten! I have 3 and they really helped me stay grounded.
3 years ago
Ariel Armstrong
Director, Producer, Screenwriter
Great article! I had to learn during the pandemic that I was given this time "for such a time as this" to continue working on my film.  This article really spoke to investing in ourselves and meditating on the wonders around us! Great job Alexia!
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
Thank you Ariel! Praying and presence go hand in hand..
3 years ago
Michael Graf
Director, Screenwriter
Thanks for sharing, Alexia. There is so much truth to this. There is so much creative freedom and joy to living authentically and in the moment, to focusing on relationships, unplugging from the artificial noise surrounding us and exploring the rich life both inside our heads and within our reach and sight and sounds in the real world around us. 
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
Thank you, Michael. So happy to know you and hopefully work together.
3 years ago
Lewis Martin
Director, Cinematographer, Screenwriter
Great blog post, Alexia! I like especially the "Stop posting just to get a one-up on others on your extraordinary life" bit. So true! We get so sucked into this blacklight. Thanks for this!
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
YES! So glad you related to this
3 years ago
Juliana Penaranda-Loftus
Producer, Documentary Filmmaker
Beautiful article. Thanks for that reminder. I am glad to know I am not the only one experiencing FOMO. It's all about reconsidering your priorities. Let's change FOMO for MASH. Nice ending !
3 years ago
MB Stevens
3D Animator, Screenwriter, Voice Actor
This is a great read, Alexia. The struggle of wanting our goals fast is real. Onward and upward. 
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
#keepgoing but always stop to smell the roses.
3 years ago
Joe Thayer
Screenwriter, Script Consultant, Director
Love this post! Especiall Number 3. Stop doing too many of too many things
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
so glad you related to it!
3 years ago
Lara Margaret Marjerrison
Screenwriter, Author, Actor
Perfect timing. Thank you.
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
Thank you for reading!
3 years ago
Prema Rose
Actor, Art Director, Choreographer, Content Creator, Dancer, Director, Filmmaker, Playwright, Producer, Screenwriter, Songwriter, Theatre Director
Right perspective changes our reality. Thanks for the nudge.
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
You are most welcome!
3 years ago
Amarachi Nwaozuzu
Screenwriter
Phewww. It's refreshing knowing you are not alone
3 years ago
Alexia Melocchi
Producer, Content Creator, Sales Agent, Advisor
I am so happy  you could relate!
3 years ago
Jean Marie Cinotto
Screenwriter
Great advice. I still can't figure out why I ever signed up for FB. Biggest time waste ever. Deactivated it over a year ago. Best thing that I have ever done. I rarely ever comment on blogs or articles even on here, but yours hit the nail on the head with unplugging. 
3 years ago
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