What are some vague notes on a pitch you've received? Like- not the full pilot, but just the pitch notes.
I'll start: "I am a bit of a structure dork, and this one feels like it will take too much heavy lifting to get into shape."
(Also, bonus points if you can tell me what is being said here...?)
Hey, Matt Walker. I'm not sure if I've had any vague notes on a pitch.
"I am a bit of a structure dork, and this one feels like it will take too much heavy lifting to get into shape" sounds like you need to do heavy lifting on the structure/you need to rework a lot of the structure (Of your pitch??? The pilot??? The series???).
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Matt,...you have excellent timing. I came on to ask a question....Does it seem that some of the individuals analyzing your pitch aren't really that perceptive?? How I interpret your quote is the reader believes your structure is too far gone to salvage. When I return later, I'll post some of the gems I've encountered. Still...the core of this business involves dealing with people (successful) and their biases and business needs.
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If it was a pitch (and not script feedback) then it seems that your major turning points weren't clear in the pitch. However, for someone to say they are a "structure dork" indicates to me they really don't understand all that structure encompasses (many don't). Structure is the Rubik's cube of a screenplay, an adjustment or alignment of one area has a ripple effect on everything. When done well, structure is far more than the major turning points of your acts (and pitch).
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I agree with Ty Strange in that it matters who you were pitching to. If you were live or paper pitching to someone like an exec here on Stage 32 for feedback, then I have no idea what that note means. If it was pitched to a manager, agent, or producer, it could probably mean that structurally, things are so out of wack that they don't think any amount of rewriting will fix it, and therefore, it's a pass. I've had a note similar before, but my experience has been that a producer/agent giving a note like that is just using your writing as a way of avoiding working with you, for whatever reasons. Because if they were interested, they would follow up with, "but what else do you have?" I don't have enough context on your situation to say for sure, but I can say, none of that is necessarily a reflection on you or your writing. Only establish an opinion after there's consensus on the same project pitched to several different people. If 3-4 people are saying the same thing, you need to investigate what the issue is. Hope I'm making sense, it's 1am here lol.