Screenwriting : Writing Love Scenes by Paul Rich

I don’t necessarily agree that a love scene is crucial to every genre; in some stories it can feel glaringly out of place/gratuitous. That being said, when I write one I handle it very carefully; I like to have only tangential details present where you know it’s a love scene but the details are left out so the reader can use their imagination as to what’s actually happening. Such scenes are very easy to mess up so I personally would advise against using a lot of detail (especially since not everyone finds the same things alluring…).

It's definitely smart to let actors, and intimacy coordinators, guide the rhythm of love scenes. I agree with that. In my own writing I try to use it to reveal character. Such an intimate thing is a part of life, and thusly should reflect how that person approaches intimacy in their life. For a driven, yet emotionally reclusive character, romance might be the only instance they don't make the first move. A more passive, yet restrained character might use the initiation of romance as an assertion.

I think a good example is Vanya in the movie Anora. He's eager, shallow, and impulsive, so he tries to initiate sex as often as he can with Anora, but when it comes to performing the act, to put it bluntly, he powers through it as quick as he can with little consideration for her. This is great writing because it tells you everything about their relationship (or lack thereof) without anybody having to plainly say it.

Modern films tend to shy away from this kind of story telling, but they really shouldn't.

I barely write them. If I do, it's one line of action. I don't agree they are crucial. They only reason you should write them out is if it's crucial to the character development or important to the story in some specific way. A director will take liberties with them anyway. I think if you've built up enough chemistry between characters, then the love between them doesn't always need to be sex or passionate WHATevers.

Love scenes are something every writer does differently! As you noted, Song Sung Blue made a delicate dance of it. While Weapons last year wrote a sex scene like this:

INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT

They f*ck.

It's all up to you the writer and the style you're trying to convey!

Here's a shocker - love scenes (and action scenes) - kill the forward momentum of the story. Literally the story stops for the love / fight scene. The story re-starts at the end of the love / action scene - who's in love, who's hurt, who is vulnerable, who runs to fight another day. But hey, they get filmed anyway.

My upcoming feature debut, “Grandma Did,” is a sex comedy about 1970s swingers, now in their 70s, who reunite at a funeral and one thing leads to another. All the sex scenes are written with careful intention to concentrate not on the act of love, but the reclaiming of human, sexual agency. Every touch and glance speaks to the emotional underpinning of the physical act.

Paul Rich I think it’s very important for the writer to actually write the love scenes. A writer’s job is to express what is inside them — who they are — not to leave that to someone else.

When I write scenes like this, I am completely inside the moment. I feel what my characters feel. I can fall in love the same way I did as a teenager — you know, that “butterflies in your stomach” kind of love. I can see the passion and the energy in my mind, and I try to translate that onto the page.

What I want is for the audience to feel the same emotions when they watch the story as I felt while writing it.

So for me, it’s very important that the writer truly writes those moments rather than leaving them entirely to others.