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LEGEND TRIPPING
By Kevin Hager
A group of friends try Legend Tripping and meet some ghostly tales.
Hoping to gain a spin-off TV series, where different Legend Trippers encounter ghostly experiances.
SYNOPSIS:
LEGEND TRIPPING
Longtime friends Jack Anderson, Sally Maeve, Carter Bruno, and Julie Walton decided to try Legend Tripping, and decide to check out a local cemetery called Red Creek Cemetery that is said to be haunted. While their they encounter a strange cemetery caretaker named old Joe who gives them three stories about some of the dead.
A man named Arnold Gates was a crooked man, he stole money from others and made it look legal. Then on day he conned money from a woman named Sarah Dee and even stole her house. One night as he contemplates how much he could make by selling the house he is visited by a woman who promises to make him pay, at first he dismisses her but then that night Arnold’s entire empire he built up through ruining people’s lives begins to crumble and finds out he is being investigated by the police and FEDs. Then when he tries to flee he gets arrested and jailed and Sarah gets her house back, and it’s revealed that her ancestor was a healer who helped many people and was making Arnold pay for his crimes, Sarah later learns Arnold was killed in prison by people he double crossed.
The next story tells of a former caretaker Simon Jacobson who bought one of the first phones, but then there were constant calls from the morgue and no one else was around. It left his marriage, career, and life in shambles.
The final story is about a man named John Edwards who kidnapped young girls to sell them for profit, then he kidnaps another girl named Leigh who tells him to let her go or he will pay. Then one night he and his girls are invited to a party by a buyer, and more girls that he could take or trade with he brings in all his customers. But when they arrive they learn it was all a ruse and Leigh reveals herself as a werewolf and the group is her werewolf pack. They spare the girls but devourer the customers and John himself is torn apart. The Police decide not to investigate believing he got what he deserved.
As the stories get intense they leave only to see more strange people before they escape and in the morning learn of a former caretaker before Simon Jacobson named Joe Greely and find he resembles Old Joe from last night. They decide no more Legend Tripping or return to Red Creek Cemetery even in daylight.
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Where's the conflict? Who fights whom about what? Logline needs a little TLC.
I like the setup, Kevin Hager ("A group of friends try Legend Tripping and meet some ghostly tales"). I agree with Lindbergh E Hollingsworth.
Here’s a logline template that might help: After/when ______ (the inciting incident/event that sets the plot in motion), a _______ (the main flaw the protagonist has to overcome in the script or an adjective that describes the protagonist’s personality) _______ (the protagonist’s job/career/role) tries to/attempts to/fights to/struggles to/strives to/sets out to/fights/battles/engages in/competes/etc. _______ (goal of story and try to add the obstacles here) to/so/in order to ________ (stakes).
The inciting incident can also be at the end of the logline: A _______ (the main flaw the protagonist has to overcome in the script or an adjective that describes the protagonist’s personality) _______ (the protagonist’s job/career/role) tries to/attempts to/fights to/struggles to/strives to/sets out to/fights/battles/engages in/competes/etc. _______ (goal of story and try to add the obstacles here) to/so/in order to ________ (stakes) after/when ______ (the inciting incident/event that sets the plot in motion).
Loglines are one or two sentences. A one-sentence logline sounds better, and it takes less time for a producer, director, etc. to read it. Try to keep your logline to 35 words or less. Long loglines can make producers, directors, etc. pass on a project.
Avoid using “must” in loglines. “Must” usually means the protagonist is forced to do whatever they need to do in the story instead of doing it willingly. You might need to use “must” in a logline though, like when the protagonist is forced by another character to do something. Using “must” to choose between two options is fine.
Names in loglines are usually for biopics, well-known stories, and franchises (like Mission: Impossible).
Sometimes I put the location and date that the story takes place in instead of the inciting incident if it’s a Period Piece script.
All stories don’t follow this logline template. Biopics, documentaries, and Experimental scripts might not follow the template. The series logline for a TV show can follow this template, but the pilot logline and episode loglines for the show might not.