Hi Paul, I really like your logline for "Ogo Pogo". I will make the following suggestions: Instead of "Seeking the truth about...", how about: "Haunted by her/his childhood encounter with a mysterious lake creature..." Also, although I realize that "Ogo Pogo" is the name given the creature, the native term may be a strange title that could be a turn-off. If you are thinking of marketing this script to Hollywood (and I think you should), consider that very seldom does Hollywood embrace a Canadian-based storyline, unless it is absolutely unchangeable in order to make the script work. The 1st script I sold in Tinseltown, only sold when my agent convinced me (pretty much against my will) to set it in the US instead. However, that being said, I realize that Canada can work as part of the character of the story. Again, these are only suggestions based on my experience. I do like the hint of mystery in your pitch as well, but as mentioned, am concerned with the title and setting. I hope these suggestions help. Keep at it. And while I haven't read your work on the page (and hope that it is as strong as this pitch) I think you're on your way. Don't give up.

Thanks Lars. I thought the same as well. But the charm is Canadian. and I based the story off of what happened to my co-writer as a child. shes Canadian.

Paul, the monster is Ogopogo, not Ogo Pogo... just to be accurate :) You're writing a screenplay that takes place in BC and you live in the US. I'm writing a novel that takes place in Manhattan and I live in BC. Sounds like we could maybe help each other out occasionally?

I would love to help Keith. My Canadian co writer loves Ogopogo and demands that its a friendly sea creature and not a monster. I dont believe any of it. Hence the screenplay. Is it enough that I believe that she believes and yet I dont? We had many conversations about it.