Screenwriting : Crazy by Stacy Gentile

Hate this place? Not at all ... quite the opposite. I am passionate about screenwriting - Passionate about the projects I'm working on.

Are these paid services you are asking for and they are turning you down? I would rather be turned down because someone is too busy than to be given shoddy work. Did you make a good impression so that when they do have time they would want to call you back? Some professionals are worth the wait. It is about networking, like it or not.

A large part of this industry is building relationships. Sorry, but it's an inconvenient truth. ;) Stacy, we all must do our due diligence and research those with whom we wish to seek out professionally. There are scams out there. What exactly are you looking for? A script consultant? A manager? An agent? If you are new to the industry then it may be too early for management. You may not be ready. If you'd like personal recommendations of various professionals, perhaps members can give you names, share their experience.

@Lisa, you are entitled to your opinion. The script has been evaluated, it has been through table reads and it has been to some degree market tested through standardized research techniques. I'm not saying it's "perfect". No script is... except maybe yours. Which is cool. I get that. Also considering no spec script goes to film as it's original draft ... I am not too worried about it. There is a HUGE market for it and it's got a solid drive train.

Beware. Facade runs amuck. Trueness OF PROFESSIONALS AND PROFESSIONALISM takes personal interaction no matter how it is sugar coated.

Not marketable? The genre for Absolution is limited? Here are some numbers, only because I like the numbers: $760M - Da Vinci Code $611M - Passion of the Christ $270M - Exodus $350M - Hannibal $ 57M - God's Not Dead (filmed for only $2M) $ 3B - Twilight Shit $215M - Dracula Untold No market for those films either I guess.

OK... just so I am clear ... you are saying there is no market for religious movies. That is what you were saying right? LISA you posted - "the hard truth is that the genre of Absolution has a very limited appeal making it that much more difficult"

I think there is a huge market and need for faith based films.

< Shakes head puts palm to face

What the hell... since I love a good twist, I'll weigh in by addressing the original question. Stacy, I think the problem is that a) there are too many writers and b) most of those writers are terrible. So imagine you're a well-regarded script consultant (or some similar professional). You may have a lot of business in the pipeline and genuinely be too busy to take anyone else on (see "a", above). If you happen to be a jerk (50/50 chance of that, like in any other industry), you might not worry about being rude to your prospect because 99 times out of a 100 you'll never encounter them again in a professional situation (due to "b", above). I believe you have a background in marketing? So you know economics too. It's supply/demand. You're trying to break into a business where the supply far outweighs the demand. And that creates a different dynamic than you'll see in, for example, the automobile repair business. (Now I grant you that the supply of GOOD scripts is very low. That's where we come to the signal/noise problem. How can your excellent script be discovered amid all that crap? When you find the answer, message it to me directly.) :)

Stacy.....a little bit of advice. Don't listen to the naysayers when it comes to your writing. and never let another's opinion be the deciding factor in what you should do or not do. You are a gifted and talented writer and YES if your script is a faith based film, especially family, then we need more films like that. When you market your screenplay, it is best to contact Producers/Directors, etc that believe in your film project. We are all here in this same family of filmmakers, screenwriters, writers of Stage32. Everyone of us should be uplifing each other towards their success just as we would want them to be towards ours. When you come across one with negativity then you need to discern and decide if they are a good environment for you as a writer. You have a gift and don't let another Stage32 neighbor tell you any different. Believe in yourself because the Red Carpet is just a walk away.

Lisa.....I never geared my comments towards anyone at all. And yes what this industry needs more of are faith based family films and no of course I didn't read his script so I don't know what type of religious film Stacy was referring to.

Baseless? .....very nice Lisa.

Lisa, I just started reading Stacy's script -- so far it does seems more horror, but I'm not finished yet. :) And, Julie, while most appreciate your positive attitude, there are some hard truths about this difficult industry. Approaching it with practical optimism is often the better choice. :)

I'm the last person to defend Lisa, we've had some differences, but some of the comments here appear a little harsh, don't you think? I'm not aware of the full history and events that have transpired, but surely she is entitled to her opinion, negative or otherwise, and trust me, we are seldom on the same page, no pun intended.

Well as a script consultant who does promote my services, I'm not sure why one would be mean or rude to a possible client seeking to pay you for your services. Certainly not Before they've even sent you a script. However, I'm a pretty busy consultant, usually booked out 3 weeks in advance and I get a lot of emails , many asking me to help them for free. Those are emails that often get a more "terse" response. But sometimes I can't get back immediately. it happens. But Stacy, I'm not sure who you've been emailing. I'm happy to help and I've actually been hired on quite a bunch of faith based projects in the last year, including by 2 faith based producers.. That being said, While I don't always agree with Lisa or how she comments, her point about looking at HOW/WHY a script got made is incredibly important. You can't cite Passion of the Christ and DaVinci Code when comparing your project unless you have a Oscar winning director attached or its based on a book that sold 20 Million copies. That's comparing apples to monkeys. There is a faith based market out there but it is split into 2 groups. the low budget family drama/dramedy, which is actually produced by faith based companies. And the huge budget studio films that happen to be about a bible story. This latter category is just as hard to break into as selling a sci fi epic trilogy. Unless, as I said, you have book sales or a great a-list package. Faith based romcoms and horror have been getting developed more but usually outside the mainstream hwood system. So, you have to know who you're targeting and the chances of it happening. be optimistic, but don't be blind to reality as one of the other posters here seems to be. Stacy, if you'd like script help, let me know.

@Stacy - one other comment to your #3 assumption in your orig post. Sure, I could look at a few pages of a script and tell you if its good or not, and it sounds so quick & easy. but if I did it for you, I'd have to do it for the 500 other writers who ask that (for free) and that's just time I don't have... it's not because we don't want to help. its because as many have said, most writers are bad and there's just not enough time or energy in a day to look at all their broken mufflers.

Stacy, I like the premise of your script, but not the execution - I read it and it requires work, you have a few rewrites ahead of you, my friend - I would suggest you take advantage of someone like Danny Manus, there are several options on this site - if you are serious about writing, you will have to put your hand in your pocket if you wish to enhance any opportunity as a writer, cheers.

I think there is a time and place for Script Doctoring and Consulting don't get me wrong. I realize that I may only have Freshman insight on this but it seems to me that the order of things is wrong. Correct me if I am wrong but shouldn't the order be: Write Spec Script > Gain Traction with a Producer > Make a Deal > Doctor / Rewrite > Produce > Distribute. What I typically see happening is Write Spec Script > Doctor > Nothing. Right? Granted. Nobody is going to look at a script that is a wreck. But one would have to believe that every script at some point will be rewritten as its being made. The people who are actually buying the script are buying the drivetrain and something "close" to finished ... not perfect. I think too many folks jump into the coverage, and editing with nothing down the road. You could give a script to 10 different folks for coverage and get 10 wildly different opinions. Who ever is going to give interest in your project is going to do their own coverage and if they buy it, they know some / most of the script will be Doctored or rewritten then. You tell me?????

I think the people with whom you are speaking (the ones offering services) are as frustrated as you are. I think they read and read the same recycled ideas, and they have been let down so often that they have become doubtful that "good shit is out there." So, I think the premise, the log lines, the first 10 pages have got to be crafted beautifully to even get their attention. I have not yet read your script Stacy. It may be glorious. But, just keep in mind that these people get bombarded constantly with a storm of crap, and are trying to pull the "praise Jesus" miracle of turning crap into gold all day/everyday. They are frustrated, too. Plus, once they give advice, many of us (as artists) tend to argue to keep our work the way it is. That's got to piss them right off, too. "Ask my advice, then shun it when I give it?" And, keep in mind, I'm speaking in generalities; not specifically to your situation. My advice is to try to learn from the stress. Even if you don't like what they say, try it (while keeping a save of your original). See what happens. Also, have the patience with them that you're asking them to have with you. We all get busy often. And, expecting exclusive and constant attention from any professional is unrealistic. Just my two cents. Good luck and God Speed. CJ

@Craytus.... I get that. There are always two sides of the coin.

@ Chanel could you private message me some thoughts?

There's a difference between Doctoring and Consulting. Yes, once a producer is attached, they may bring in a script doctor before preproduction to get the draft production ready. But that process will not include you. And that process is much different than the writer getting feedback & help Before sending it to a producer in order to make sure its ready. I'm not saying you can't get a producer without working with a consultant. But producers don't want projects that are 50% there anymore - it needs to be 85% there. And most new writers are unable to get it there themselves without some professional direction. So, if you're going to spend good money (and time & energy) getting a producer, why wouldn't you spend a few hundred making sure you're ready to do that?

Great points Ron.

I've made a pretty good career in my DAY JOB of going into companies and helping them reinvent themselves. When I decided to get involved with Screenwriting all of the inefficiencies jumped out at me like a Giant Red Siren. It's Crazy. I don't see how the process that are in place work for anyone on either side of the coin. I am wired to be a fixer. A task in this circumstance that is 1 - beyond my capabilities and 2 - so rooted in legacy problems that it's probably unfixable. Although, maybe things like the BlackList can start to turn the tide. A combination of efficiency / Screening / and serious folks on the backend looking for projects. I am almost beginning to think it's easier and a straighter line to just raise the money. What's easier? Raising $106 Million or getting lucky with finding a champion for your project? Hmmm Going to give this some thought. Don[t jump on me for the number...its only an example figure.

It's my understanding that raising money is a lot harder than it used to be. Maybe it would be easier to invent a time machine, go back to the late 90's and raise the money.

@James - LOL. I already tried that. BTW I think money at the higher levels is loosening up a little. The money in the middle is gone and finding money for indy stuff isn't too hard but getting the film seen and distributed has industry pros baffled still. At least that's what I am reading. But don't listen to me...I don't know much and haven't done anything. I'm just a blind man stumbling around in the night.

Stacy, there's a big difference between a single organization and an entire market. Despite what some would like to believe, most markets are thickly marbled with inefficiencies. The film industry (or industries, depending on how you look at it) is not a perfectly functioning system, but the major stakeholders are well served by it. Or well enough, anyway. It might be putting up huge barriers to entry for you personally to break in but that just means it is (as we say in my day job industry, software) "functioning as designed". If Alan Greenspan couldn't fix the NASDAQ and Ben Bernanke couldn't fix the housing market, you (as you state) are not going to be able to fix the film industry.

Welcome to Flakesville. Don't try to understand it, just know who can help you and when to move on.

Ron - you want to help me unpack those thoughts a little?

Stacy, this is a race and you seem to be spending too much time concentrating on the finish line - before you race you need preparation, get that right and you're still only at the starting line - I've read your script, I would concentrate less on securing a producer and making a deal and focus more on improving the product and this means professional help - your call, but get your script ready as a calling card first.

Chanel - I really appreciate that thanks. Sorry you didn't like it. Maybe a pro like yourself could give me some more insights / pointers on producing a industry ready script. I'm a sponge but can't do too much with general stuff like - fix it. I looked at your profile but I couldn't see any of your IMDB credits. What are some of the projects you worked on? Or maybe you could refer me to one of the films you produced. I could find the scripts that way to see how you did it, if you didn't want to take the time to send them over. I would love to learn more or hear about your experiences is selling scripts.

I didn't say I didn't like it, but certainly plenty of room for improvement, which is only an opinion, someone else may see genius - fixing your script is not difficult, but time consuming, hence I suggest you seek a consultant - will e-mail you - re my credentials, I have uploaded 3 screenplays of early drafts as an example of my work - some will like it, some will not, but that is out of my hands and at least I have something up for public scrutiny, something most members here refrain from doing for whatever rationale.

Hi Stacy. I was able to finish reading your script this morning, and I do concur with all the other peer reviewers who selflessly took the time to offer their thoughts and share their opinions. I sent my review in a private message. I hope it helps. :)

Oops, fixed it. I meant "selflessly"...Sometimes I type way too fast. :/

You had me worried there for a moment, Beth, lol - this is another example, Stacy, of how people on this site are prepared to help each other.

Yeah, sorry about that, Chanel... sometimes my mind moves much faster than my fingers. LOL! ;)

Oh, and then my typing speeds up and I realize typos are flying around everywhere. What a mess. I think I'll just stop for the day. :) Best to you!

@ Stacy - - "experts" who seem to be soliciting business, then are rude to inquiries from potential clients, are clearly doing it to showboat vs advertise. You are too diplomatic to mention names but naturally you have made everyone curious.

Haha! That's great, Owen!!! But, sadly, no. I'm just in my usual state of sleep deprivation... Perhaps I should pour myself a nice glass of gin and tonic. Or, better yet, some pinot noir -- my favorite. :) Cheers!

Alle, I've read the script. It's not religious in the sense of a biblical story or a family film. It's a drama/action thriller set in modern times. It borrows from the story of Cain and Able -- Cain, who's an immortal in this version. The story's theme is about forgiveness and what lengths one might take to seek it.

Hmm. paralell biblical exploration with flasbacks of angst? You ladies should help her. And that's all I got to say about that. I have no idea of what the actual screenplay is but by Beth's description that quickly comes to mind. Sounds like it's at least mid-concept. Peace out I have to go garden now. Gabriel, Michael, Judas or the famous count. Sorta see something there. Lillith, Eve. Can relate to the sleep deprivation I'm never ready to sleep unless my soul is ready to leave my body. Good luck ladies.

After reading all of the drama in this post, I was curious to read the actual story. I did read it. A few thoughts: Conceptually and structurally, I like the main story and how it moves. Christian's role throughout the story is the most credible, and so is Eve's. In the sub-story, Eve's struggles with God could be even better fleshed out, maybe by adding some more short scenes like a dream sequence, current conversations, and something like a scene in the poor village's church. Maybe one of the struggling villagers explains to her why, even though they are so poor, they still have faith and believe in God, and how that belief keeps them going - like it kept the slaves going. The romantic relationship between Miriam and Daniel was a bit of a reach in its present form. Maybe you should consider revising that first meeting between them. Maybe make it that they were old lovers from years ago who parted ways because work took them to different parts of the world. That would make it more believable in my eyes, more redeeming/fulfilling to them, and more evocative to the audience. It could also provide some occasional comic relief at times, since they both seemed to have the added complexity of humorous personalities. I like that there is a covert lab in the jungle, which plausibly opens up those different conflicts that lead to the climax, and explains why Peter was there, and what Christian's real goal is. Good job on creating all of that, and of tying it all neatly together. That was pretty clever and creative. From a dialogue standpoint, I think that a lot of the dialogue seems to be not realistic to the characters. That's a hard area of scriptwriting for all writers, regardless of level of proficiency. "How does this type of person talk?" I think all of the characters need better voices. Christian's voice is probably the best-developed and most credible, but they all need better and more refined voices. From a medical/scientific fact standpoint, I don't know anything at all about all of the different medical/science theories, terminologies and processes that played out, so I'll take your word that it's all factually correct, and commend you on those added complexities to your script. From a grammar/spelling/punctuation standpoint, the script is literally littered with hundreds of typos, and errors in spelling, syntax and grammar usage. The most common mistakes include your use of contractions with verbs and possesive nouns, like "this's" and dozens of others, and your use of ellipses instead of periods and commas. You should also always write out the word for numbers under ten, and not numerically represent them. You need to go through the whole script word by word and spend that entire read-through cleaning up these problems. I'd call this more of a thriller than anything else, and think that the harderst parts - a good concept, a good storyline, and believable characters - are pretty much there. I think a few more revealing scenes; better dialogue; and eliminating the typos/syntax/grammar errors will make this a really good script. Good job.

Not bad, Bill, I agree mostly - the relationship between Miriam and Daniel may have been better served had they been old lovers, I mean, she's 60 years of age and it would have made a nice tie-in - the characters need a better defined voice, I found Eve's "Ya" rather annoying and too much of the dialogue is "pleasant" rather than "sharp" - I like the premise and Stacy is on the right track, but it needs work.

I only read the first 12 pages, but Bill's review seems pretty right on especially with the dialogue and typos.

@ Bill - Loved the idea about Miriam and Daniel being past lovers, maybe in college. Already incorporated that. The script hasn't gone through editing yet. Sorry if there are some typos or grammer things. It's not at that stage yet. I am cleaning as I go but it will go off to a poof reader and grammar Nazi before it goes out. I need to focus on getting other parts industry ready first. Like working out drive train issues and cutting things down. I have already started the 5th rewrite and it's better because of all of your help 32 - THANKS!!!!! I am VERY much open to PEER REVIEWS and I have been taking advice here and putting it in.

Best advice I know is, make sure the script is PERFECT before you show it to ANYBODY. Typos are the sign of an amateur. A lot of script readers at the studios (and most indie producers as well) will only read until the first typo, then they throw your script in the "Reject" pile. This is a brutal, cut-throat business, and the perceived rudeness is actually their version of "tough love". Take it as such. And if there's anything I can do to help, Give me a shout.

I'm learning myself the difference between eagerness and enthusiasm. Maybe I'll blog about it sometime. What really sucks is when you have no one to share eagerness with yet we can all share enthusiasm. Even when a work is just almost there we get overly eager to share. Done it many times myself and still do in some respects. I also think that sometimes people misinterpret eagerness and enthusiasm. Mark is right and it keeps us from backtracking and sometimes we honestly don't see out opportunity for betterment until after that eagerness got us. With all that said there is also a naturalness to being wishy washy at times. Anyway good luck to you. Hope they help you because this sounds like a really solid, maybe even high concept endeavor. Michael L. Burris "Life is too short not to look at the lighter side of it." & "I'm trying my damnedest not fly around like a blind bird." http://michaellburris.com

This has been a long running thread on 32 and I just wanted to reach out to everyone who commented with a thank you. You might find this surprising but many of the comments here were actually taken seriously and incorporated into the 5th rewrite which I just completed. For anyone who actually read the script and private messaged me insights and ideas - a special thank you to you! As a new writer I cannot express how helpful most of you here on 32 have been. Because of you, I am already a better writer and have a much better script in Absolution.

I do screenplay consulting and I don't blow people off as long as they don't expect me to work for free or cheap. I charge $100 for a half-hour script, $200 for 1 hour, and $350 for a feature. My website is www.lauridonahue.com.

Stacy: When you call a doctors office and the doctor has all the patients they can see, they don't bring you in, look you over and then recommend another doctor for you. Instead they secretary tells you they are not taking on new patients. My vet is also this way. Your auto mechanic has spoiled you for the real world.