One of my goals was to finish the rough draft of my latest dialog driven horror screenplay by the end of October, and the pitch-ready version by end of year. I'm happy to announce that tonight I wrote the final scene of the rough draft. Except I'm less thrilled with the script than I'd hoped. My goal was to really nail the dialog-driven aspect of it. Think Clerks (though without humor), Glengarry Glen Ross (in terms of sharp banter), or even When Harry Met Sally, where back-and-forth dialog do the heavy lifting for the story.
As this was my first attempt at such an approach, I didn't expect to knock it out of the park, but I did worse than I was hoping. My plan now is to practice writing dialog exchanges between the two main characters until I get a better feel for their individual voices and subtextual cues. I will also probably rewatch a few dialog-driven films with captions on to try to deconstruct what makes them work so well.
Has anyone here written what they feel is a successful dialog-driven script? If so, what was your path to success and or tips I should consider? I've never really struggled with dialog or voice before in a novel or screenplay, but it's also never been front and center like it is in this story. If the dialog falls flat (and right now it does), it drags the whole story down with the ship.
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Congratulations on finishing the rough draft, Patrick Koepke! Watching dialog-driven films and deconstructing what makes them work so well is a great idea! Maybe read some dialog-driven scripts.
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A few good movies to watch for reference might be Carnage (Polanski), Tape (Linklater), and The Party (Sally Potter).
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Thank you Pat Alexander and Maurice Vaughan! I'll look into those.
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The Man From Earth (2007)
it’s all dialogue primarily one location and leaves you thinking about it long afterward. free to watch on a Samsung tv
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^^yuppp, The Man From Earth is legendary
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I'll check it out. Thank you Shawn E. Cline !
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One of my inspirations for great banter is "Midnight Run," especially for my character- and dialogue-driven script AN ENTIRELY IMPOSSIBLE ROLLERCOASTER. I think when the banter is good, you just know it, because every line leads to the next one, and to the next one, and the scene can go on and go on forever. My trick for writing such dialogue is to a) know my characters well and feel what they feel; and b) say the lines out loud - then I can tell exactly what the next line will be, and the next, and so on.
I'm happy to take a look at some of your dialogue and help out with it if you want.
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@Patrick I’m guessing, it’s a minimal location Horror? Dialogue is key factor low budget cos few options for “Physical Action,” moving scene by scene. Or are there numerous locations & it’s a case of being a Hybrid, Drama/Horror genre? Harry Met Sally smacks comedy. Can answer fully, if know more about intention of script.
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Liron Vardi Thank you! I love the "say the lines out loud" idea. This isn't something I've ever done before but that makes a ton of sense. I'll DM you. Thank you!
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@Debbie Croysdale - You hit the nail on the head. My screenplay is minimal location horror and only three characters, so dialog really has to carry the day. There's also only a single small location where they are trapped. It's not a dynamic location but the danger does escalate as the story progresses deeper into act 2 and into act 3.
I watched When Harry Met Sally last night (I hadn't seen it since it came out) with the captions on and paid special attention to how the dialog flow works throughout each scene. My characters are in a similar relationship to Harry/Sally, not in will-they-won't-they approach, but two characters with mental walls up that circle each other, find a connection, lower the walls, then snipe and step back, resetting the game board, and so on, which helped a lot.
After the movie I wrote a couple of test scenes for my characters that followed that structure and one of the things I liked about them was that they felt more spontaneous than the ones I'd already written in my rough draft, which are more like "let me tell you a story" rather than banter.
I'm not there yet and want to watch a few more films recommended above as well.
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@Patrick Your reply re “let me tell you a story” shows, you already know, one of the main problems of dialogue, is exposition dumps. With a novel, facts can be delivered by narration or writing well but scripts can offer a problem. How to relay information, by visuals on screen? Without the characters telling. You’re taking steps in mastering that craft, making their exchanges more organic & holistic. Subtext too can be used to full advantage. Having a strong relationship line in horror, adds an extra dimension, for character led sub plots. Even a whole separate story, if ghosts, zombies etc are taken out of the equation, there can still be switches, stings & character arcs. Audiences can be misdirected, or know something one party does not. Maybe one has a secret? Maybe when faced with the final crucible, one betrays the other, bails out or becomes the other’s hero. Possibilities are numerous. Also, tie the relationship line, to the action line. Don’t go off on a tangent, instead use their emotional beats, to add to, or heighten the climax of each sequence. They are not separate to the main plot, their choices & behaviour should drive it, even if dire circumstances are forced & outside their control. Psychology too, can be a weapon, to defeat the enemy.