LOGLINE: A 19th Century farming family’s simple life is shattered as their newly adopted son’s repressed memories reveal an insidious past and an unquestionable thirst for blood. Orphan Train is a story that’s changed and evolved for about a year now; originally a novel and eventually becoming the basis for a 4 issue comic series which had two publishers interested until I was unable to draw due to a car accident injuring my hand. I’m now very excited to see it morph once again into my latest horror related film script!
Your Stage : Finally Wrapped Up The Outline For My New Horror Feature, ORPHAN TRAIN! by Eric WC Harmon
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3 people like this
Good job on finishing the first steps. However, the logline is lacking. Is the son a vampire? Axe murderer? Thirst for blood is too vague. And is there an individual protagonist? The logline should lead with and follow that person and their personal struggle.
1 person likes this
Appreciate the feedback! To be honest, loglines have never been my strength, especially early in the process. When the story is still fresh for me, I have a harder time cutting the fat and nailing the scripts core in 25 words
2 people like this
It doesn’t have to be the whole script. Tell us about the protagonist, what they want and what they’re willing to risk to get it. No b-story or background needed.