Screenwriting : How Many Writers Does it Take to Screw in a Lightbulb? by Terri Viani

Terri Viani

How Many Writers Does it Take to Screw in a Lightbulb?

Lisa Clemen's posted this joke on one of my posts: "How many screenwriters does it take to change a lightbulb? Who cares, the Director will change it anyway!" And I loved it so much I looked up additional writer/lightbulb jokes. Enjoy! =D Q. How many writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Ten. One to change it; nine to think they could have done it better. Q: How many writers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: But why do we have to change it? Q: How many writers does it take to change a light bulb? A: Just one, but the light bulb has to endure a series of conflicts and challenges before it finally changes. Q: How many writers does it take to change a light bulb? Ten. One to change the light bulb. Four to say that they'd already had the idea for changing a light bulb, but they didn't want to show anyone what they were doing until they'd polished their light-bulb-changing. Two to point out that someone else had already changed a light bulb, so changing another one was unoriginal and thus not worthwhile. Three to call light bulbs a new technology that was going to be catastrophic for traditional candlelight-driven writers. And one to figure out that writers are lousy at math. AND MY FAVORITE: Q: How many reviewers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None. They just stand back and critique while you do it.

Lisa Clemens

So glad you liked that! There's another version where the punchline is, "Change it? Why? I love it the way it is!"

Tina Goldsack

Lol Lol Lol Lol!

Gemma Middleton

Hahahaha! Those jokes have cheered up my morning! Thanks for sharing!

Terri Viani

Hahahaha glad everyone enjoyed them! =D

Gemma Middleton

I just saw another one and HAD to share...lol How many screenwriters does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: Ten. 1st draft. Hero changes light bulb. 2nd draft. Villain changes light bulb. 3rd draft. Hero stops villain from changing light bulb. Villain falls to death. 4th draft. Lose the light bulb. 5th draft. Light bulb back in. Fluorescent instead of tungsten. 6th draft. Villain breaks bulb, uses it to kill hero's mentor. 7th draft. Fluorescent not working. Back to tungsten. 8th draft. Hero forces villain to eat light bulb. 9th draft. Hero laments loss of light bulb. Doesn't change it. 10th draft. Hero changes light bulb.

Erica Benedikty

Okay I had one too, I know it's lame but It's funny in my mind. How many screenwriters does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: none. There is no light bulb... How many screenwriters does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: none. Cue the Sun.

Niksa Maric

It takes 5. 1 just stands still and holds a light bulb, the other 4 hold the table and run in circle.

Gemma Middleton

Haha...followed by another seminar to learn how to keep the lightbulb lit!

Gemma Middleton

Sooooo, how many writers does it take to light a candle? lol

Gemma Middleton

With fire in their bellies.

Terri Viani

Hahahahaha Fiona, brilliant! "Gritty lightbulb dramas are out. We're looking for quirky candlestick comedies. Something Lumiere might do." "I don't really understand the lightbulb's arc. Why is he willing to just let all these people come in and change him? At the very least shouldn't there be a shoot-out first?" "Can we get a scene of the lightbulb in a strip club?"

Gemma Middleton

Shot under fluorescent lighting..

Gemma Middleton

I think the 3 of us could produce the most interesting film about a lightbulb that the word has ever seen! Eat your heart out 'The Brave Little Toaster' here comes 'The Illuminated Lightbulb'

Erica Benedikty

Don't forget the twist ending, the switch was 'off'.

CJ Walley

How many writers does it take to change a lightbulb? One; "an incandescent lamp".

John Totten

It doesn't matter. The director will change it anyway.

Bill Costantini

Bumped up to brighten your day. Bam, bam, hodad!

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